......22.......23!!

Hello guys,

Its been a very long while since I made a blogpost. A lot has been going on from school work, to organizing events and even emotional conflicts. Its all not been easy but im so happy I
took the bold step in writing this today even though I have an exam in two days lol.

Did I mention, its my birthday today? hence the title of this post. I clocked 23 today, Glory be to God! and yh I know I am pretty young but trust me the mind isnt ;)

So lets get right into the topic for today. Like I said earlier, I am 23 and I just want to share a few deep thoughts. I will be sharing some of my experiences. Lets call it a reflection on the past to polish the future. I will start with some of the good things. May 24th 2016, I turned 22. That alone is worth thankful for and I recall I was really excited. I had my 4th year medical school exams and passed them all. In November 2016, I launched my small makeup brush line/beauty and fashion company- Deluxe Hues which was a very big achievement I must say and since then we have been growing gradually. The highlight of my life at 22 was the death of my beloved mother. If you have read my post from some months back 'My first christmas without mummy' you would know this. My mum fell ill in May and was sick till her death on the 6th of September 2016. This was definitely the most difficult time of my life and I am so surprised I have been able to stand strong. It is still very difficult for me because she was a major part of my life, my world, my everything and even on this day being my birthday, I can only imagine all that she would have done or said to me. I dont even know if I have come to terms with the fact that shes gone or I have just plain accepted the theoretical knowledge of the fact that she is dead.

I tell you today, this has been the hardest time of my life. Having to deal with similar cases in school as a medical student and how her life could have been saved, if only our Nigerian doctors knew what they were doing or had the right equipment or diagnosis. This doesn't make it any easier for me.

She died in September 2016 and fast forward to May 2017, nothing's changed, I still feel every pain like it was the first time I heard the news. This is something you will never understand until you have lost someone so close to your heart. Its like the pain never goes away, its like its lifelong. I am here to encourage myself and anyone out there that might be having a hard time dealing with pain as deep as losing a loved one or whatever the cause of the pain may be. Its ok to be sad, It's ok to cry for as long and hard as you want. It is not ok to suck up your feelings because you feel it's been long enough, no time is long enough. Dont beat yourself up for crying so hard and embarrassing yourself in the presence of your friends. Dealing with pain can drive you to depression and other forms of mental/emotional instability. Just take it one day at a time and never forget that God is with you and he will never leave you at a time like this. You cannot go through this pain alone, if you go about it the wrong way you'd end up on the wrong side of life. This is the most crucial time of your life where you will be hypersensitive to anything. Just keep your eyes focused on God and all will be well at the end I can assure you so do not fret :)

For those who have not experienced this form of pain caused by grief, try not to condemn what the other person is going through. However form they choose to show their emotion or express their feelings should be accepted, as long as it isn't dangerous to you or the person in question. Please bear with them and allow them to express themselves as this is the only way they could heal. No one is better off than the person that is grieving. Death isn't for specific people, its for everyone and anyone can lose a loved one at anytime.

I am so grateful for how far I have come and all I have been able to achieve in a short while despite the circumstances. I am very positive that God's got my back this new year and greater things are yet to unravel in my life. Join me to celebrate this big 23 and much more years to come and happy birthday to anyone who has their birthdays today and in the month of May.

Thank you so much for your time and remember Nothing is Impossible!

xoxo
Obsy P.

Instagram: @obsy_p Deluxe_hues
facebook: Sweetie Inyang; Deluxe_Hues
Website: deluxehues.com